𝐆𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐈𝐬 𝐀𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐀 𝐏𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞

Nov 29, 2021 - 9:10PM

"I guess people with criminal records can be poets too__"

Nov 29, 2021 - 6:04PM

"if farts are fair game, so is g0d"

Nov 26, 2021 - 7:47PM

"I shave, sir. I have a driver's license. I've won a couple of fist fights. I've saved a life. I've lain with women. I've been hustled at pool. I've defied my father's wishes. I have broken hearts and I have been heartbroken. So, by all the markers of this society, I am a grown man."

Nov 21, 2021 - 4:13PM

a sponsored message from one of my favorite things i do:

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Nov 21, 2021 - 1:11PM

i love how many diy queer pop/rock artists are making moves rn

Nov 21, 2021 - 1:06PM

"they call you a rat because rats will do anything to survive, isn't that right?" -- goodfellas, still.

Nov 21, 2021 - 11:23AM

this is the 2nd time ive been to this urgent care in less than 2 months 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

Nov 18, 2021 - 7:58PM

"that's what the fbi would never understand, that this organization offered protection for people who couldn't go to the cops." -- goodfellas

Nov 16, 2021 - 6:44PM

I can hear tenderqueers talking about how they hate being discriminated against for being tenderqueers and I just threw up. they're unrelated but they feel similar

Nov 16, 2021 - 2:04PM

overheard 2 ppl at the family dollar talking and one was telling the other abt how the girl he's sleeping with said "I suck your dick better than anyone else" as a point towards him being w/ her AND HE SAID TO HIS FRIEND, AT REGULAR TALKING VOLUME, IN THE FAMILY DOLLAR, "I wasn't gonna tell her but that's not even true, like I'm not going to get into it, but she's really full of herself with that" and I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! L A U G H

Nov 16, 2021 - 12:02PM

i guess Being In Recovery means being the person who gets dr+gs stolen from them and not the person who is stealing the dr+gs 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪

Nov 16, 2021 - 11:57AM

"prepare for the lovely unexpected" https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/andie-nordgren-the-short-instructional-manifesto-for-relationship-anarchy

Nov 16, 2021 - 11:56AM

TENDERIZE MY HEART

Nov 16, 2021 - 11:31AM

/pop punk band vocals voice/

she says she sa-ays YOURE SO GOOD AT THIS

i say i sa-ay THANKS, IM LITERALLY A PROFESSIONAL, DO YOU THINK U COULD LEAVE ME A REVIEW OR--? /line clicks/ HELLO? HELLOOO?

Nov 14, 2021 - 10:12PM

M A S C //////////// U P

Nov 13, 2021 - 6:06PM

"doors @ 7, orgy @ 8"

Nov 13, 2021 - 5:54PM

THE CARD I PULLED TODAY SAID I HAVE THE WRONG IMPRESSION OF SOMEONE AND IM WORRIED ITS ABOUT THE PERSON IM THINKING ABOUT ?? JFC RUDE I SHOULD NOT HAVE PULLED A CARD TODAY LMAO

Nov 13, 2021 - 11:50AM

three years ago was the last time i saw my partner, my lover, my comet, my star-- i miss them every day. i can't leave the country anymore, and they live across the border, so this poem i wrote them a year after we last kissed, hits Xtra hard rn. thank you, whoever you are, for reading and sharing in this feeling with me.💙

xoxoxo

MA COMÈTE

it has been a year since the last time i kissed you

goodbye, (again--) and this is the first year in this

life we’ve known each other for that we won’t

pass a lighter back and forth, or touch each others’

hair, or hold pinkies or dance across streets or

sing too loud in my car to each new mambo that

encourages our bodies out of their skins--

O g_d i thought i’d become acquainted with

longing in all her disguises, but this one is

by far that which stings the most-- it is not our

hearts that keep us from holding each other

sweating stupidly in the first hotel bed we

can crash in-- its how our fake-countries’

fake-borders draw a child’s sandbox-line

between us and i’ve stood up to some

bullies in my days but when they’re holding

guns it's not smart for me to throw a punch

that could end with my wrists in cuffs--

mon amour, je ne savais pas i could miss

kissing you au revoir, but if we are leaving,

it means, before that, at least-- we were / together.

Nov 13, 2021 - 11:42AM

Behold!

I come like a thief--

Oh child, you cannot stay awake

this long.

Were you raised to fear yourself

like I was?

Oh darling, a yew-bloom into debt-sin.

Is this not what you wanted?

Creation without limit?

Oh, where are my manners?

Let me introduce you to perdition.

I lay myself on your chest.

My home is your voice.

Child, I am crazed with you.

Oh, strapped for sustenance--

I will consume all you love.

I will consume all who love you.

[revolution and/or revelation]

[revulsion and/or revision]

There is no escape without sleep.

I am a w[hole]. I empty as I fill.

Child, I missed you. I mist you.

I guest you. I ghost you.

I will be your final meal.

I will meet you within the past.

We will walk the aisle

to the altar of the future.

This will be our final communication.

[commission from late 2020, to be played as a game on a website that I can't currently remember the name of but I'll edit this post if I think of it lmao]

Nov 13, 2021 - 8:10AM

being an adult is putting the fitted sheet back on yr bed during sxx instead of just flinging it across the room to be dealt with when the drxgs wear off

Nov 12, 2021 - 6:28PM

some dude just went down the street singing so in love by ed sheeran at the top of his lungs !!!! and it was GOOD n i hope whatever he's got going on is going well

Nov 12, 2021 - 4:01PM

about 10 dogs just started barking outside of my window and it was STARTLING

Nov 12, 2021 - 3:56PM

i gotta stop using ppls names in stories i tell l m f a o

Nov 12, 2021 - 12:29PM

"When the person you are visiting enters and departs you may exchange a brief kiss and embrace.

No other kissing or hugging is allowed. You may hold hands."

-- CFCF prison website

Nov 12, 2021 - 12:34AM

VENUS IN TAURUS

i left after she

came. already planning on

lying at home, too.

Nov 11, 2021 - 7:39PM

doing silent meditations at the queer/trans AhhhAhhhh meeting, so I'm putting my thoughts here:

Self-Acceptance

  1. what if one doesn't believe in a loving gød?

  2. i wonder if ive ever properly meditated before

  3. i wonder if ive ever meditated at ALL before

  4. what are the psycho/physiological requirements for meditating?

  5. maybe meditation is playing the block game

  6. MAYBE MEDITATION IS JUST TAKING A NAP

  7. im gonna write in my notebook when i have access to markers again (whenever this meeting ends) bc sometimes i just need to draw big letters and i feel better

  8. ART IS MEDITATING

  9. do you think there is a difference btwn something being "meditative" as a description and """actually""" """meditating"""?

  10. finally made it to 10 thoughts n i c e

  11. maybe i should do 12 tho? bc of the 12 steps? -bojack voice- Do YoU gEt iT??

  12. holy shit I'm pretty fucking sure some JOCK who went to my high school just sat down at this, the QUEER A N D TRANS AA MEETINg. -coming of age movie voice- november, you just got interesting 😏

Nov 11, 2021 - 9:14AM

i keep coming back to a convo w/ a friend i had about pulling cards every other day instead of every day and it's a cool concept: less stress of remembering to do something every day, more time to consider how you interact w/ the world thru the lense of that card. i think it would be interesting to document the times the cards speak to me in relation to things happening in my life, so i can see if pulling them is having any significant impact on my quality of life/mental health/etc.

Nov 05, 2021 - 2:37AM

my eye only twitches when I drink energy drinks

Nov 05, 2021 - 12:37AM

""scorched earth""

Nov 04, 2021 - 8:33PM

THIS ISNT A FAST RAP

it's a bash back

it's fingering you in the whip bad

the practice,

chiropractic,

bend you over,

hear your back crack

it's a risk had

with the feds back

wear a hat back

in my backpack

slicked back

clit sucked

cop whacked

jack off

get your shit

fuck your rich dad

eat my shit, Chad

I'm in rehab(no I'm not)

just needed a spot

to drop off my hot

legal it's nawt

fuck what you want

if I hear you talk shit

I'll flirt with your mom

I'll call her a cunt

I'll beat up your boyfriend

I COULD BE A GØD

my body is raw

my mind is the saw

lobotomy is NOT

...the right choice tho lol.

Nov 03, 2021 - 10:21AM

FAKE JOCK ON THE MIC

I took time to get this right

put my martens to the metal when

I couldn't take a flight

wouldn't snitch in a sitch,

wouldn't fall in a fight

told my boss that I quit

on my way to fuck his wife 😮👀

fake jock on your dick

my personality is "sick"

I've got prescriptions, perceptions,

my body, aggressive, my heart so

dramatic, it beats like a manic,

a mania unclothed,

soprano in bathrobe,

I've got addictions and bitches

who want my attention

I've got lovers in corners

from past and to forward

an email eating me

out of your hand

you ask me my name

but then leave with your band

you're touring nearby

so on one leg I stand

flamingoing out

with my head in the sand

I like your wristbands

I fuck like a man

you like me again

I leave you again

is that what you wanted?

well then what was your plan?????!!!!

Nov 03, 2021 - 10:16AM

~ITS A FREE-WRITE KID~

you're not supposed to feel like this

tell you you're not real like this

get a medic for your manic, now you're PMS

can't drop a beat like this

clean your sheets like this

went to college for the coochie,

now I'm lonely like this

kid, buck up, make a fist

fuck up, pay for this

dick sucked, pray for this

girl cucked, aim for this

wrists slit, take a hit

parents didn't pay for this

nose stuffed, that's the shit

you gotta fuck or pay for it

I'm a burglar, not a cat

I'm psychotic, not on crack

I guess I could be down with that

got propositioned on my porch

he's got a dime, I'll take a fourth

chalk it up to "it's not worth"

come try me again at work

come try me again in bed

handcuff me just like a fed

told to talk, I never do

got picked up like pay per view

got locked up without my crew

I was fucked up til you came thru!!

Nov 03, 2021 - 9:41AM

concept:

when mgk wrote "you're a Libra I'm a Taurus / I heard you hooked back up with your ex"

he was talking about Halsey, who is a Libra (he is a taurus), and that would've been written around the time Halsey and the dude who fathered H's child got together ,,,

so I guess my biggest question is , does Megan Fox care that MGK can't stop writing abt Halsey?

an even bigger question is,, can I stop thinking about myself by thinking about celebrities instead ??!! Let's Find Out (:

Nov 01, 2021 - 6:56PM

gender of the day is "fuckshit cousin"

Oct 30, 2021 - 4:44PM

g∅ddamnb i finally have tinnitus i guess ugh

Oct 29, 2021 - 10:21PM

i need to go to therapy bc talking abt depressing things 2 my friends makes me AND THEM depressed + that succs, i cried a lot and reached out to some therapists who hopefully take my insurance, i need to Not Fuckin Stop Taking My Meds, which i tried this past week, and it Did Not Go Well, Clearly lmfao.

Oct 29, 2021 - 8:20PM

CRYING IN THE 7/11 PARKING LOT,,,, SHE SAID,

"you're like a pot of gold tucked away in a cave just over the crest of a mountain range"

AND THEN SHE SAID,

"a trek to find yet truly so cherishable and view is so worthwhile"

AND I KEPT CRYING BUT IT FELT OKAY I FELT OKAY

Oct 28, 2021 - 7:23PM

alright guys ive scheduled The Surgery* at the end of November !!!!

*gettin part of my spine removed so i can walk properly lmao

Oct 17, 2021 - 7:53PM

pigs grunting

Oct 16, 2021 - 11:37AM

been thinking about the theoretical existence of a lesson plan for something titled I Don't Want You Like A Best Friend: The Overt Saphhic and Quiet Queerness of Taylor Swift's Music, made with info my friends have collected from a decade of Gaylor research 🤔🤔

Oct 16, 2021 - 11:15AM

im not anti-FA, im anti fa la la la la la la la la

Oct 16, 2021 - 11:13AM

wow can't wait for The Surgery*

*severing my torso and getting rid of the rest

Oct 14, 2021 - 9:18PM

my favorite sound in the world is strangers laughing in the distance, it just brings me JOY !

Oct 13, 2021 - 4:46PM

ALL GUILTS ARE PLEASURES

Oct 13, 2021 - 4:46PM

a blessed object that looks like a cursed object

Oct 11, 2021 - 8:50AM

spoiler alert: new simpsons episode sucks

Oct 08, 2021 - 8:06PM

"injury or birth"

Oct 08, 2021 - 5:57PM

2day i also listened to 2 different ppl vent while also making plans w 2 other different ppl

technology has evolved in such a way that im expected to split my attention 4 ways and retain none of the convos and comfort none of my friends rather than do them all individually / less immediately // ya feel ?? i wish my brain would slow down vs. speed up when it would actually be helpful

Oct 08, 2021 - 5:54PM

IM MEANER THAN REGINA

BITCH YOU JUST A PENIS

I WOULD CALL YOU PUSSY

BUT PUSSY JUST LIKE JESUS

YOU SAY IM A BUTTHEAD

BITCH YOU MUST BE BEVIS

(!!!!!!!!!)

{baby tate}

Oct 08, 2021 - 5:52PM

2day i tasted my homie's breast milk and can confirm it's sweet just like her

Oct 07, 2021 - 2:06PM

acid 222 stimmies 222 cashmonay 222 tattuu (!!!!) "the guy who sells a paperclip and buys a house but the g@y dr*g version"

Oct 06, 2021 - 5:40PM

booking a bunch of tattoo appointments to fill the void in myself that happened after booking a bunch of doctors appointments

Oct 02, 2021 - 9:02PM

i just love markdown it's so kitch

Oct 02, 2021 - 8:58PM

[imperceptible]

Oct 02, 2021 - 6:29PM

i didn't feel comfortable in my femininity until i got top surgery (!!!!!!) & i know a lot of other ppl feel this way, & i wish i could connect more, but i love just knowing ive got kindred spirits out there <3

Oct 02, 2021 - 4:01PM

s[i/u]n

Oct 02, 2021 - 3:58PM

i said, i know you're tough, you don't have to prove it to me

and then she said, the hardest thing about us is our tattoos

Oct 02, 2021 - 3:55PM

gonna start doing some things differently.

Oct 02, 2021 - 3:54PM

0 DD 777o

Sep 30, 2021 - 5:17PM

"some change cannot be fought, only accepted w/ grace. let yrself move forward, and put this battle behind you."

Sep 30, 2021 - 5:16PM

"a leadership role also demands that you know when to step back"

Sep 30, 2021 - 5:15PM

"there are resources available to you that can only be capitalized upon thru boundless persistence"

Sep 29, 2021 - 9:44PM

fuck, i think i love her, and

Sep 29, 2021 - 9:12PM

am i being followed by the cops or does a cop car just happen to be behind me

Sep 29, 2021 - 9:07PM

The Hole In Me is gettin ROUGH around the edges

Sep 28, 2021 - 2:52PM

reasons i am like Silvio Dante:

Sep 24, 2021 - 9:45PM

im the second smallest cat in the world's second favorite person !!! she falls asleep and wakes up with me like a dream but it's better

Sep 24, 2021 - 9:41PM

WHY is words with friends the only app that still uses my govt name????? it's just RUDE

Sep 23, 2021 - 10:36PM

IF NOT ABLE TO ELIMINATE THE OPTION OF CAPTURE ONE SHOULD AT LEAST MINIMIZE THE OPPORTUNITY FOR IT

Sep 22, 2021 - 9:17PM

ever notice how skinny ppl only ever hang out with other skinny ppl lmao

Sep 21, 2021 - 10:28PM

last 2 nights ive dreamt that i got cancelled,,, @g0d what does it MEAN

Sep 19, 2021 - 5:34PM

they told me it was lox AND creamcheese but they gave me lox-BASED creamcheese 😤

Sep 18, 2021 - 11:06PM

i can be friends w/ppl who dnt always see eye2eye, rite??

Sep 18, 2021 - 9:28PM

where should i leave to?

when am i welcome?

howdoiknowhowdoiknowhowdoiiiiiii

Sep 17, 2021 - 8:59PM

currently: spraying coconut milk whipped cream into my mouth

Sep 17, 2021 - 5:03PM

I honestly love going on Venmo and looking at strangers public transactions it's like people watching except I'm baffled as to WHY they didn't just put it on private lmaoo

Sep 16, 2021 - 9:01AM

when ur in a polyam relationship and ur partner cheats on you there's rly no way to quantify or explain it there's just this chasm where trust used to be

Sep 11, 2021 - 7:29PM

horse tranq makes brain feel freshly ironed

Sep 11, 2021 - 9:44AM

woke up from a beautiful dream crying bc it has no basis in reality

Sep 10, 2021 - 9:26PM

IF I REPEAT IT ENOUGH TIMES IT BECOMES TRUE

IF I REPEAT IT ENOUGH TIMES IT BECOMES ALIVE

IF I BELIEVE IT ENOUGH TIMES IT REPEATS

IF I BELIEVE IT REPEATS IT BECOMES ALIVE

IF I BELIEVE IT ALIVE IT BECOMES TRUE

Sep 08, 2021 - 7:21AM

can't beliEVe spotify suggested the playlist "straightedge anthems" to me why the FUCK can't I just bring horse tranquilizers into this HOSPital without being JUDGED

Sep 08, 2021 - 7:16AM

crying in pain b4 bringing someone else to the hospital

Sep 06, 2021 - 8:59PM

talking w/ my lawyer is just thought-crime intervention ya know lmao

Sep 06, 2021 - 8:57PM

i put everything bagel seasoning on rice and it slaps yall

Sep 06, 2021 - 8:56PM

UNEMPLOYED

&&&

UNEMPLOYABLE

&&&

thus,

UNGOVERNABLE

Sep 06, 2021 - 5:26PM

i forgot how much i love cucumbers, esp persian cucumbers

Sep 05, 2021 - 10:33PM

i understand why this book is an international success but the author describes women so rudely that it barely seems worth it

Sep 02, 2021 - 10:37PM

YOU CAN TRY BUT I WONT GO QUIET

IN THE BACK OF A COP CAR

YOU CAN TRY BUT I WONT GO QUIET

I N T H E B A C K O F A C O P C A R

Sep 02, 2021 - 5:34PM

IF I CANT HAVE LOVE I WANT POWER

Sep 02, 2021 - 2:01PM

do you think jinxing is real? Like talking about stuff will scare it away from happening?

Sep 02, 2021 - 1:39PM

sex is just a weapon that you won't have to use a lot if you're any good at it

Aug 30, 2021 - 11:56PM

can we please start cancelling poets I wanna duke it out in the arena like g0ds

Aug 30, 2021 - 11:48PM

having relationships that change and grow to contain the experiences of that friendship is a blessing. I am learning how to accept support from anywhere even if it is somewhere I wouldn't have accepted before. I am realizing I can hold negative things I know a person has done in the same breath as I know they are anchoring me into the moment. I am so so raw but I want it to work, in the sense that I don't ever want to feel estranged from my heart-friends, even if our paths are no longer together I want to cheer my ex-lovers on! I want to be a supportive person and feel confident about my support people. I want to know in my soul that you will have my back even if we never talk after this. I want to wake up with the ghost of your hand lingering on my hair.

Aug 30, 2021 - 1:06PM

if you see this post yr encouraged to take this survey: https://tiny.cc/acab

Aug 29, 2021 - 11:56PM

I'm worried my doctor is gonna make me stop eating fun foods :(

Aug 29, 2021 - 9:48PM

"queerer than a box of birds"

Aug 29, 2021 - 5:39PM

I'm from EN. E. DOUBLEYOU. jerz

Aug 28, 2021 - 9:15AM

i knew it was serious when they took my passport + locked the door

Aug 26, 2021 - 2:50PM

IF I DIE IN CUSTODY AND THEY CALL IT A SUICIDE JUST KNOW THAT IT WASN'T AND THEY KILLED ME

Aug 26, 2021 - 2:37PM

just ate a wawa sandwich + drank a tim hortons coffee @ the same time 🙏😇🙌

Aug 26, 2021 - 2:34PM

"activation time is 60 min" bi t ch i'm ILL

Aug 26, 2021 - 1:49PM

the bass hits different when yr not here

Aug 24, 2021 - 5:56PM

I FELL IN LOVE / IN THE BACK / OF A COP CAR

Aug 24, 2021 - 5:54PM

"my identity by itself causes violence"

Aug 24, 2021 - 1:39PM

A BAD BITCH

GAVE ME BOMB HEAD

TO BAD BRAINS

[run the jewels]

Aug 23, 2021 - 11:56PM

falling asleep sitting up dreaming about praying in my pastor's voice

Aug 23, 2021 - 1:04PM

"you'd hate a cop car too if you ever had to sit in the back of it" [dae zhen]

Aug 22, 2021 - 8:26PM

Erasure Made From The [Feb. 2015] Issue Of [Poetry Mag]

where-ever the waves of ignorance

named our art, some other feeling

knew of the sky's holes. arrive

in time to a dream played with.

wedged between death and reality,

the inner biography guillotines

the past. we read about the

assassinations of anarchists.

we make it up as we go along.

Aug 22, 2021 - 8:22PM

Erasure Made From The [March 2015] Issue Of [Poetry Mag], II.

you fly across the country to see your friend

grieving. when you look you see something

missing. ruin the british museum! believe

there's more beauty in the world. damn the

world for the man next to you. you can

calculate the way / across. an afterlife,

in case She's waiting.

Aug 22, 2021 - 8:19PM

Erasure Made From The [March 2015] Issue Of [Poetry Mag], I.

our child / has become / a closet

crouched among / the empty cold

come out, come out! i will

probably play a trick--

hello up there! did you offer

him your disguise?

did he climb through you?

did he step inside you?

is it black / in there?

Aug 22, 2021 - 8:10PM

did some math & i'm p sure i'm now 6 months alc. sober

(:

Aug 22, 2021 - 8:09PM

TODAY I WENT TO AN EDA MEETING AND TALKED ABOUT MY PARENTS AND I DIDNT DIE

Aug 21, 2021 - 5:01PM

hmmm looks like today's gender is "crying in the laundromat"

Aug 13, 2021 - 11:07AM

fuck: bro

marry: bruh

kill: bra

Aug 09, 2021 - 12:20AM

read a letter today from someone on death row who is rapidly going blind + is being ignored by all the prison doctors, who he says have basically given up on him, + not to put too fine of a point on it, but that's why i hate anyone who works with prisons or cops, even if they don't see themselves as cops; they're just as complicit in upholding the dehumanization of individuals in the system.

Aug 05, 2021 - 2:01PM

i really frICkeED iT Up ThIs tImE didn't i my duuUUUuude

Aug 05, 2021 - 1:59PM

goob mourning

Aug 02, 2021 - 5:35PM

chopsticks are also tiny drumsticks

Aug 02, 2021 - 3:34PM

if Wicked (the book) and Bojack Horseman were in the same universe, that would account for how a feral baby existed in that episode about Hank Hippopopalous and thusly bit him on television (also i was that feral baby)

Aug 02, 2021 - 3:32PM

roses are red

the thin line is blue

your bosses & landlord

don't care abt u!!!!!!!!!!!

Jul 31, 2021 - 11:37PM

i am the family emergency

Jul 31, 2021 - 11:32PM

fuck: shit-talking

marry: pillow-talk

kill: emotional labor

Jul 26, 2021 - 11:40PM

????i keep pulling the lovers card and yet????!!!??nO lovers:(

Jul 26, 2021 - 10:01PM

FUCK

MARRY

KILL

they said they would kill themself if i left / but i still did / and then they didn’t-- / they said they wanted to kill him / but they didn’t / and then i stayed / anyway, again-- / let them choke me into confession / admission / submission / i bit both our tongues / you say you love me + i taste / blood / i say i love you + you / leave, anyway--

(video killed the radio star): my voice dips low into your ear / melted wax / shuttered room / you could buy me but you won't / i'm already scarred / i'm not / new enough--

i'm worried she's going to die: and i won't know for too long, like, long enough that when i finally mourn it lives inside me scared to leave in case i start forgetting that i left like lightning striking in the distance / you heard it in / my voice before you saw / i left scorch marks behind

Jul 26, 2021 - 7:48PM

do ppl who identify as marxist leninists know that stalin consolidated that ideology while he was killing the masses to keep them from rebelling against the famine + anti-semitism he leveled at them? or are they just tryna get laid

Jul 26, 2021 - 2:48PM

holding my bag / like i'm packing a fad / put the dabs in the cooler / so they know that we're bad / i've got the lockbox combo / to your girlfriend's dick / turn the lights down now / cuz i'm about to be sick (HOLY SHIT)

my lawyer's on retainer / so you know that I'm that bitch / keep a blade on my bod / cuz i was born in 96

lifestyle hater with that / jealous aesthetic / coked a bitch up / just to show you i can get it / jock-jam door-slam / that's too much man / you've got a screenshot fetish / your gender is pathetic / and your boyfriend's not a fag / so i just don't get it (!!!!!!!????????)

so take a seat / smoke the leaf / while we drop this beat (FUCK)

my lawyer's on retainer / so you know that I'm that bitch / keep a blade on my bod / cuz I was born in 96 / used to drinky like tankini / so I can't just take a sip / put my throttle on the bottle / like I'm pissing in the Ritz

your girlfriend's cisgender / you know I choke better / i guess that's whatever / put my glass in your ass / til you start to stutter / bitch please / I've got more sexpertice / than her health class taught her / bout STDs / that's right dumb slut / put your hands on my tits / if you ask me where they went / then you're gonna get split / up the side like fishnets bitches / wear when they ride / on that transgender dick

my lawyer's on retainer / so you know that I'm that bitch / keep a blade on my body / I was born in 96 / used to drinky like tankini / so I can't just take a sip / put my throttle on the bottle / like I'm pissing in the Ritz / now put the dope in the back / when we're drive past pigs (HA)

Jul 26, 2021 - 2:29PM

I.

the astrologers in their infinite mercy

only cluck at my cards this time

II.

we all know i’ll skip a party to wait for

a text that doesn’t happen

III.

i’m not making my bed i haven’t in weeks

i’m just lying in it

IX.

i came out when poets still listed the states

we were allowed to consummate

marriage in and the crowd chanted

their contrapuntal traumas back

to us

Jul 26, 2021 - 2:22PM

THE COP WATCHING ME UNDRESS IN JAIL TELLS ME HOW MANY FELLOW COPS’ FUNERALS SHE’S BEEN TO

recently like maybe i’d want to listen (so i am)

she’s tired of seeing her friends’ faces

blown up big screen behind their barren bodies

yeah well so am i

so am i

so am i

so am i

[[[

.

.

.

here are the places the poem could dissolve into its easy narratives:

my friend’s face choked above a cop’s fist flashes--

but it’s more than that

she has a dog she’s wanted to go home to this whole night shift

but it’s more than that

(i can’t tell what response she’s been told to small-talk out of me)

but it’s more than that

.

.

.

]]]

i’m still handing her my underwear

she still searches me when we leave the room

i’m still naked on camera [action]ing

i’ve still got identical scaphoid scars

//

the [girl]cops doing intake still dance to that one song

with the siren layed beat like they’re not

waiting with the baton at the end of it

//

(i don’t know how they find the raptongue

to singalong when they make fun of me for

knowing the words but not

knowing my lawyer’s phone number--)

//

(like i didn’t know they’d find me)

(like this wasn’t my fuckin song)

Jul 26, 2021 - 2:16PM

one time i read something that said "​whenever i feel uncomfortable in public i write i really gassed up missed connection about myself and feel better" and its truly stuck w/ me as a self-care tactic

Jul 26, 2021 - 2:15PM

​multiple small birds keyboard smashing to funky jamz

Jul 26, 2021 - 12:11AM

some reimagined words i like:

traggot (trans+faggot)

vant (vent+rant)

bussy (boy-pussy)

jort (short jeans)

svp ('pls' but french)

anartist (anarcho-artist, can be deg. or not)

shants (either 'shall nots' or 'shit pants')

jockey (wearing jeans while playing hockey)

Jul 25, 2021 - 3:00PM

THE NEW JERSEY DEVIL STOPS BEING A PACIFIST AFTER WATCHING COPS BEAT ITS FRIENDS INTO THE PAVEMENT

The New Jersey Devil is being followed by an unmarked car (again) (today). The New Jersey Devil sits across from the jail-warden and looks at its own mugshot upside-down. The New Jersey Devil watches the camera watching it eat naked shit naked sleep naked sob naked glare back at it naked. The New Jersey Devil finds the only not-Bible book during the one un-solitary hour and it is Hamlet so thus reads each sentence twice then recites it back to itself like it is the Ghost and the voice-crack and the Accident and the scene-change all at once. The New Jersey Devil is told it is unsafe but the jail-warden is not telling the New Jersey Devil how it feels he is telling it how it is classified. The New Jersey Devil does not know how long it prayed to a sliver of sky before realizing it was just a brick wall’s painted taunt. The New Jersey Devil has handcuff scars for months after. Later, the New Jersey Devil learns a prayer exists in a lover’s language that begs the skulls of their enemies cracked open on rocks like brunch eggs. Later, the New Jersey Devil practices the script of its emergency contact number so often it recitals in its sleep. Now, the New Jersey Devil does not have it memorized (yet) (again). Now, the New Jersey Devil gets one phone call and it rings and rings and rings and rings and rings and rings and rings and rings and rings and

Jul 25, 2021 - 2:58PM

IN TRANNY JAIL PEOPLE WHO HATE ME WILL SHARE THEIR CIGS WITH ME

i don't even like cigs but

around the fire we are all the same kind

of faggot /

there are liberals who think the solution to

overcrowded prisons is building

more prisons

then sorting the trannies out of regular jail

and putting them in a newly built

tranny jail

and in tranny jail,

we're gonna lift weights and compare shitty tattoos

in tranny jail,

people who have beef with me probably still

have beef with me and i wonder

all the time if we're all

in tranny jail together,

will we finally uplift each other?

will tranny jail make us kinder animals?

(we'll never know b/c if they get enuf of us in a cell we'll bang down the bars)


moi × acab × host × again?